19 Self-Concepts I’ve Come to Terms with after 19 Years Of Marriage

Divina Grey
6 min readNov 14, 2019

Mr. Grey and I had a pretty good laugh last night. We concluded that the idiosyncrasies we thought were “cute" nineteen years ago are now things we are in intensive therapy for.

Funny how things work out sometimes.

Today, November 13, 2019, marks the nineteenth year we’ve been together. Technically, we’ve only been married for fourteen of those years, but as happily as damn clams at high tide nevertheless — with some super salty times in between.

He was my first (almost) everything, and, nineteen years ago, I wanted him to be my last. I still do. But in a less codependent sort of way. I’m making a beeline to a place where there’s ample room for growth, self-reflection, self-improvement, independence, and healthier connections all around.

Once again, I’m here to work through my marital issues and gain some much-needed perspective.

1.) I’m codependent.

This one is a doozy for me. I had no idea how codependent I had become until I started to peel back the layers one embarrassing symptom at a time.

The more I untangle myself from the unloveable web I’ve been spinning for nineteen years, the more I hear that authentic voice in my head gets louder and more precise. It…



Divina Grey

Mom 💕| Writer ✍ | Musician 🤘🎸| CNA 💜 | Sporty Spice 🏋️‍♀️🚵‍♀️ | Free Spirit ✌🏳️‍🌈 | Coffee Connoisseur ☕ | divinasrelease@gmail.com 💻📧